We all experience moments that irritate us. And although we can’t avoid life’s frustrations how we react can completely change our mood, perspective, and the course of our day after something annoying or frustrating happens. When it comes to finding tips and tools to reframe in a frustrating moment, it helps to hear what works for other people.

1. Don’t try to stop feeling hopeless in any way, not even by meditating

If you feel defeated and sad, don’t force yourself to feel otherwise. Whatever you’re feeling is a huge rolling snowball. Fighting it in your head is like trying to stop the snowball by throwing more snow at it. Instead of stopping it, you only make it bigger and faster. Likewise, you are giving too much importance to your hopelessness if you try to fight it directly with your mind. You are only feeding into its momentum. You might think meditation is the key to feeling better, but it can’t help you numb your emotions. I know, because I’m an experienced meditator and I’ve fallen into this trap.

2. List five things you’re grateful for

Practicing gratitude helps you when you feel bothered or frustrated. Quickly think of five things you are super grateful for. This exercise can truly shift you into a more positive mindset, giving you the opportunity to separate from any yuckiness. It really helps in shifting out of the not-so-great emotional place of frustration.”

3. Engage your mind by doing what’s fun, not what’s right

Don’t dwell on the hopelessness. You need to do things to get you out of your head and into your body. And no, you are not going to do anything purely to suppress your emotions. It doesn’t work. Instead, do things because you like to do them. What do you do for fun? What do you do to relax/ What you normally do when you feel bored? Don’t force yourself to do anything just because somebody says it’s good for you. Not even me. Running is good, no doubt. But what’s the point of forcing yourself to run if you hate every second of it? Discover which activities are fun and engaging to you personally. These activities engage your mind and body the most, and they can take you into the present most effectively.

4. Step away for a walk

Take a deep breath, and walk away from the situation.  Change your physical environment,  allow your mind some space to look at the situation from a different perspective. It is important not to react immediately, but to try to find a lesson or improvement I can make. That little bit of physical space really helps.

5. Put your worries on paper

When you are hopeless and worried, you live in your head. You keep reminding yourself of the same hopeless future projections again and again. When your worries exist in thought-form, you can never solve them. Problems look bigger than they really are. This is why often we turn a small problem into a big one. Just sit down for a moment. Take time and write down all your problems on paper. When you do this, you stop dwelling on them because you can physically see them with your eyes. Problems will become real objects you can analyze and solve hands-on.

6. Think of one positive thing which can keep you away from the negative

It is easy for your thoughts to shift to being negative when stressful situations occur. Try to let go of negative thoughts and focus on something positive, despite how small.

7. The Biggest Secret That’ll Get You through The Darkest of Times

Eventually, you will face a challenge that will be your last one—we all will. But likely not this time. This will not be the end. Think of all the struggles and hardships you’ve gone through. No matter how vividly painful and traumatic they were, you somehow managed to get through. On the outside, you may look weak and worn down. But I know that deep inside you are a strong soul. And I know that just like before, you will survive, and you will become even stronger because of it, just like I did. So don’t worry. Don’t even worry about trying not to worry. Whatever happens, just remember the only thing that matters is the process. Ignore the urge to fight your feelings, and focus on finding your own balance between action and self-care.


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